from PRAYERS BY THE LAKE

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Excerpt from Prayers by the Lake LXXXV by St. Nickolai of Ochrid and Zica


Wherever a king is found, there is also a kingdom. A king without a kingdom is not a king, nor is a widowed kingdom a kingdom.

"The kingdom of heaven is within you," said the Royal Son, and joy has illuminated all those wayfarers in the cemeteries, who have understood this heavenly message.

A Moslem does not believe that You ever touch the filthy earth. The pagan sees You entirely composed of earth. The Royal Son knows the royal way, and manifests You in purest earth. In purest earth He even clothed Himself and came down to bring luminescence and essence.

O my King, You are nearer to me than my breath and dwell deeper within me than my thoughts.

What is my breath except something that enters into me from outside and leaves? Even before my lungs began breathing You were inside me. You knew of me while I was still in my father's loins. Even before the creation of the world You thought about me.

What are my thoughts except the impressions of external objects, impressions which enter my mind like threads in a loom, where they are woven and brought together, disjoined and lost? All objects are outside my mind, and objects do not enter my mind but only their impressions.

However You are the only reality of my mind, with which my mind is also born. And You were in me before any impression was; You were in contact with me before I had contact with any object.

From the time I first heard the glad tidings of the King, I have spread out my soul like a canopy over most precious treasures and have sought You and Your Kingdom within her. I have spread her out and I see no end or bottom to her. I can neither reach all her height, nor descend into all her vaults.

I have discovered radiant rays, which indicate some sun in the distance. I have discovered the golden columns of a temple, but nowhere do I see any end to the temple.

I smell the fragrant scent of a censer's incense, but I cannot glimpse a royal throne.

The more I keep trying and discover, the more I see the One who is hidden.
You placed unimagined mysteries in me, O Lord of countless hosts. In each of Your soldiers Your royal radiance shines.

Just as a sun does not exist without radiant rays, so is the King not without His angels, His radiant rays.

You bring infinity with Yourself, my King, and You bring infinity into my soul.
You cloak Yourself with eternity as with a mantle, my King, and with this mantle you cloak my soul.

The Spirit creates His own Where and When, and is not dependent on His creations.

O Lord, Most Rich, I am discovering myself apart from the senses when I gaze into my soul. What immense wealth You have accumulated into this paltry earthen vessel!

Wherever You are, there also is the kingdom of heaven; and wherever the kingdom of heaven is, You are also.

If Your kingdom has not entered me, truly neither shall I enter Your kingdom.

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